A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops