What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

A praying mantis is very graceful

Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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