How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops