A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

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What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

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If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son, your mother and I once had those problems but we got through it.

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A muslim walks into a airport. He then boards his flight and is flown to his destination.

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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being sober in a bar fight

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

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What do you call it? Whatever it is.

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A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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