Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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