Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops