Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Knock knock. Its open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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