What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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