one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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penis. nuff said.

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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Beka has AIDS

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was younger, he was made fun of by all the bigger numbers. Everyday after school he would go home and wonder why he was made fun of. Was it his looks? How tall he was? The pain and suffering never stopped. He thought of suicide every day he got home from school. One day his mom got home from work and found 6 bleeding in the shower. She thought he was dead. She hurried him to the hospital where he was barely kept alive. After months of recovery, he started going back to school. The bullying never stopped, they started calling him a loser who should have died. He got older and depressed as a teenager. He got ahold of alcohol and began drinking. He went to meetings and got over his addiction. 10 years later he meets up with 7. It takes him back to his horrible childhood with the big numbers. Every time 6 sees 7, he gets reminded of everything. 7 had also murdered someone in front of 6.

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops