Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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