Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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What's one plus one? two.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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FATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLE FATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPE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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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