whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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