What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

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What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Ok,here's one, my brother can sometimes do it! Ok. Think of a number between 1 and 10 Add ten Add ten Add ten Add five Add five Take away your original number \~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\ _______________________________________ Is your number NOW, 40? Was your original number 6? Click thumbs up if that WAS your answer! ????????

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

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Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

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whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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