Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

thumb_up thumb_down +1

jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What rhymes with milk...milf

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops