In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

a man was shot.... he died

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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