So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

Committing Suicide #YOLO

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...