So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

drugs.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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