What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops