What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

Why was the man sad? His wife left

What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

You idiot thats 9 letters

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...