a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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What do you call a moose with a 12 gauge shotgun bullet through it's head? Open Season

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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woman's rights

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops