Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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Penis

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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