Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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