knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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12/23/2012

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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