A baby seal walks into a club.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...