Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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taking out the trash... at night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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