how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

What is the name of the car? What

if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

Find the I in the iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIiIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I`ve got a car behind me. Don`t worry about that you have aids.

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...