What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

the sky is green no it is not

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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