How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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http://adf.ly/C8MqG

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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