Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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