Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Knock Knock. Doors open

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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