Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down -9

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why the FFUUU did you go back? Because I broke something huur.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the student go to university? To pursue a higher education.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did God tell Moses to deliver to the Hebrews? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A young penguin walks into a bar with tears streaming down his face. "Whats wrong with you?" asks the barman. "I've lost my Dad", says the Penguin. The barman asks, "What's he look like?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops