An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

Who is Dank? A: Billal

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

A chicken walked into the bar...

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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