A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

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What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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