A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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( . Y . )

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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