One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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Why? Because.

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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69

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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Anti-Joke Chicken

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