I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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