Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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What computer sings the best? A Dell? No a Mac, because they are the superior computer.

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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womens rights.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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