Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

quantum physics?

Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Asian women drivers...

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...