Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

justin beiber sucks

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

karn chevalier

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Albino African Americans

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...