Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!B

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My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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silver bullet?

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

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lol

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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