What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

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Balls

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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why is this joke funny because your laughing

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So a guy is playing jeopardy and decides to choose the category "Therapist." so he tells the host, "I'll take the rapist for 200."

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Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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