What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

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What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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To mama so old, she might die soon.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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