Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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How tall is oprah.. 5'7

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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