Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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Jordan is pregant

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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Communism hehe xd

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops