Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

How do you kill a black man There is many ways

Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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