Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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Why did the cat die? Johnny put in the microwave.

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A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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