why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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