What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

What hurts like hell? HELL

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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