Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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Q. How can you find true love? A. Google it...duh

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There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

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How does a black man laugh? He schuckles

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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