-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

What is the difference between 10 dead babies and a 1,000,000 dollar car I don't have a 1,000,00 dollar car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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