what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

In my country we don't swim, we drown.

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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